Morning Coffee

 Life things are fairly tense at the moment, doing their best to make me crazy. But these two are always consistent--into everything, running through the house like a herd of elephants, watching the squirrels (who are extremely active right now--they're a show of their own!) and then sleeping so they can do it all again.

I've survived every bump in the road so far, I'll survive this one. The fact that it's my daughter's bump, not my own, probably makes it feel worse.

But, once a parent, always a parent. I don't think I was adequately warned back in my 20's before I decided to get pregnant!

So, deep breath, brain storm, and back into the fray! And always with a smile on my face!

Life In Illinois

Farming season is in full swing! This is what life in Illinois is like this time of year. Well, off and on again until the crops are in and snow is falling!

Heavy

It doesn't feel like Christmas. I usually enjoy putting up the decorations and usually do it Thanksgiving weekend, but this year I can't seem to get into the mood. I know part of it is the fact that I think the cats are going to be a problem and some of my pieces are fragile. I think another part of my problem is that I am mad all of the time anymore. Work, politics, trying to figure out how to pay the bills. I'm not normally like this. And I've been trying to shake it off. But I guess some things just can't be shaken off! As far as the money thing goes I just have to hope I find a different job (not likely) or my husband gets more hours where he works (not looking likely, either). I wish I could think of a business we could start. I sell Avon and the hubby sells baseball cards on Ebay, but neither is profitable enough to help much. I'm mad about work. My son worked at the store where I work and a couple of weeks ago he quit. Things are such a mess there and things were said, things that had been building for a while. My son said some immature things, but he's still a kid. They say immature things. But he wouldn't have if the boss hadn't started it. Now my son feels bad about what happened and I really do blame the adult in the situation. He should have know better. So now I hurt for my son. I'm mad about the political situation. Last week my step-brother sent a joke e-mail. I guess I never realized we are on opposite sides of the political spectrum. I'm sure he found the joke hilarious, but it just pissed me off to no end. I started twice to respond to it, finally I just deleted it. Nasty words from me wouldn't have helped any thing. But there is so much that I keep quiet about just to keep peace within the family. And I'm finding it to be heavier and heavier to carry inside. And I miss my daughter. She'll be home in two weeks. Maybe by then I won't feel like crying all of the time. And then I can enjoy the Season. My rule was not to blog about the negative, but right now I'm just not feeling much positive. I think when we feel this heavy inside, it's hard to see the good things going on around us. My brother, who I haven't seen in over a year, is going to be here for a couple of nights at the end of the week (passing through for work) and I'm excited to see him. I guess I'll just try to hold on to that feeling for now!