Westward, Ho

Today is my daughter's last day at home before she leaves for her new life in California. We will drive to Lafayette, Indiana tomorrow, spend the night and then Monday morning I'll drive her, her girlfriend and gf's father to Indianapolis to catch their plane. Gf's father is going to go with them to help them get into housing and get settled. Originally, I had thought we would drive out there and haul her stuff, but crossing Nebraska, Wyoming and Utah in January could be tricky. Plus, it would have taken all of my vacation time and money we really don't have right now. So the plan became that they will fly and I'll send her stuff when she gets an address. There is a big part of me that wishes I could be on that plane Monday, but money and my own dislike of flying is keeping me in Illinois. In 2008 I got her settled in Indianapolis and then cried all the way home because I felt like I was abandoning her, even though it was were she wanted and needed to be. I thought it would be easier this time since I've done it once before and plus she is older. It's not easier. It was an adjustment when she moved back home in June after going to school in Indianapolis for almost two years, but I've gotten used to her being here again. I am having such a hard time with this.